A Big Ass Bowl Of Oatmeal

feast-worthy, Uncategorized

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Shit happens, and suddenly one day it’s 46 degrees and sunny out until Mother NatureĀ is all like naaa girl, you ain’t even know what’s coming. Then I wake up, it’s 18 degrees, and I can’t breathe because the heat in my building (which I cannot control) is on full blast and my mouth is so dry I feel like I ate an entire cotton field. Or a container of cinnamon, IDK.

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A breakfast memoir

Uncategorized

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Breakfast is my favorite meal. It’s very versatile, the possibilities are endless (yes, cold pizza from the night before is included in this spectrum) and it’s just good. If I were an edible menu item, I think I could be painted as an endless breakfast buffet table. Not those gnarly stainless steel tubs oozing with piles of teriyaki farm animals attacking each other.