Manhandling Muffins, etc.



You know when you want something really, really badly so you call the store to put it on hold with the deathly fear that there’s only one left on the planet in your size and everyone will die if you don’t obtain your item of desire?


Feeling Deceived



I consider myself somewhat of a veggie burger connoisseur, among other things. The situation above is clearly not a veggie burger. Hold your buns, it’s coming. Anyways, I was ecstatic to finally inhale some premium goods at Superiority Burger.

A Big Ass Bowl Of Oatmeal

feast-worthy, Uncategorized


Shit happens, and suddenly one day it’s 46 degrees and sunny out until Mother Nature is all like naaa girl, you ain’t even know what’s coming. Then I wake up, it’s 18 degrees, and I can’t breathe because the heat in my building (which I cannot control) is on full blast and my mouth is so dry I feel like I ate an entire cotton field. Or a container of cinnamon, IDK.

Please hold while I enlighten the shit out of you.

feast-worthy, Uncategorized

cafe henrie yc

If you’re ordering a behind-the-glass-case sandwich, you’re doing life wrong. You’ve failed at maximizing the full coffee shop sandwich potential.I feel it is my duty as a caffeine-doting citizen to show you the way. Please redeem yourself accordingly.

BRB, moving to Cali.



Yes, I fell off the face of the planet for 3 weeks. But I think this post is my redemption point. Also, I promise to share all things devoured along my two week Euro feast trip. Alert: I found almond milk in Hvar, Croatia. Alert part two: I had whole milk the rest of the trip. I can’t drink straight espresso, what did you want me to do? FML.